Best of both cultures

What say you on the issue below?

It has been 12 good years of feasting on family dishes and exchanging gifts for award-winning Afdlin Shauki and his family.

DIRECTOR-Actor Afdlin Shauki and producer wife Maria Christina Orow Abdullah will be celebrating their 12th wedding anniversary next month. This also means that the couple has been celebrating Hari Raya a dozen times.

“It has been a smooth-sailing journey. We sort of go with the flow, you know, celebrating Hari Raya with my family and Christmas with her family in Sabah,” said Afdlin, referring to his happy marriage to Christina.

Happy family: (clockwise from top) Christina, Afdlin, Anaif and Mia Sara, who enjoy celebrating both Hari Raya and Christmas.

“Being in a mixed marriage is not a big shock for me as I come from a mixed marriage family, my father is Sabahan Kadazan-Dusun and my mother is from Greece,” said Christina.

“And personally, I believe just because you are from a different culture doesn’t mean that you are a different human being.

“And whether a marriage is working or not, has nothing to do with race and religion. It boils down to the level of acceptance between the couple.”

Afdlin and Christina also come from different backgrounds, but as Christina put it, “they embrace their differences”.

“I only have one sister while Afdlin has nine siblings, so it takes a bit of getting used to initially. But I have no problem with that.

“Being with Afdlin has taught me to appreciate big company and being close-knit. In my own family, we are independent and we do things our own way,” said Christina, 36.

The two started off as colleagues and after 10 months of serious dating, they got married in October 1997.

“I remember telling my mother about Afdlin and she said ‘If you think he is the right guy for you then go for it.’ Then I told her that we might have to wait a year or so and she was like, ‘What are you waiting for?’”

“Christina’s father didn’t have much problem with her becoming a Muslim because there are several Muslims in the extended family circle,” explained Afdlin, who has two daughters and another child on the way.

Christina recalled the first Hari Raya she had with her husband. “Afdlin cooked most of the dishes as I was not good at cooking. But now I’m getting better ... stir-frying vegetables Chinese-style,” said Christina with a laugh.

“I love cooking and Hari Raya is the only time I can really do it wholeheartedly. You know, dishes famous in Johor like Laksa Johor, Lontong, Nasi Impit and Kuah Lodeh. But I haven’t managed to do much cooking in the past few years with my work commitment so Christina, with the help of my mother, has to cook for the family,” explained the 38-year-old Afdlin.

“I guess I’m pretty good in cooking. My mother came from a family of cooks so I guess it just rubs off on me,” he added.

“We like the different celebrations of Hari Raya and Christmas, Afdlin likes Christmas celebration a lot with gifts and stuff,” said Christina, adding that their daughters – Mia Sara, 10, and Anaif, seven, – love both celebrations.

“As for myself, growing up in Sabah, I don’t really see things such as race and religion, we are oblivious to that.”

“For me, in any broken marriage, race and religion are just excuses. It boils down to the fact that they are not willing to accept each other’s differences. In any relationship, patience and communication play an important part.”

The practice of seeking forgiveness is something Christina is used to.

“Asking for forgiveness from your elderly is nothing new to me as we do the same thing in Greece. I remember when my grandfather was still around during Easter and Christmas, we would shake his hands asking for forgiveness.

“Hence, when he came to Malaysia many years ago he totally fell in love with everything. He fell in love with Sabah and Datuk Sharifah Aini and bought seven of her albums,” quipped Christina.

For Afdlin, his first Christmas celebration was something he would always remember.

“Our first Christmas together was in Greece as Christina’s mother is an Orthodox Christian. It was a bit weird for me as the celebration was influenced a lot by Turkish culture and being a Muslim we just observed their cultures and ceremony,” said Afdlin.

Just like in the past 11 years, the family will spend the first day of Hari Raya with Afdlin’s mother in Kuala Lumpur.

“Every Hari Raya, we will visit my mother (in Kuala Lumpur), where all the family members congregate and stay until after dinner,” said Afdlin, who will be having his own open house to treat his friends to Raya goodies.